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You Baffle Me!

A friend had travelled here for a conference and was staying with me. One night, my boyfriend, S, came over for dinner. The three of us were having a great conversation until we touched on an issue that led her to take a firm and unreasonable stance. So, we started debating. S and I held the opposite view. Soon, we were having a heated debate. No one was backing down. We used science, philosophy, logic, but she wouldn’t budge. I could not accept such a narrow and discriminative view from her. I had to educate her. S is very skilled at debating and extremely bright. At one point he just stopped arguing, and stayed quiet no matter how much I tried to engage him. It was a little while before I noticed he must have had a reason to stop. For a split second, I took a step back and realized this issue is something she has been struggling with emotionally. It relates to her family. Logic had no place here. In that moment, she was a person in pain. Winning an argument lost its importance. My friend had been suffering with this issue for years. Her belief was her way of making sense of all that had happened to her. The realization changed my disposition. She instantly calmed down. That night I learned the beauty of true compassion.

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Posted on September 13th, 2013 by butterfly

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