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I have always been proud of helping others. If there is one thing that I know I am good at, its probably helping those in need. I have always wondered why people in need always come to me. Its like I am a beacon to them as I lure them to me. Unfortunately despite everything good that I have done to most people that need my aid, I am deeply saddened by the fact that some of them have shameless taken advantage of my kindness on them. How does this happen? Simple. They come to me seeking my help. They tell me everything there is to know. I take pity on them then help them. Eventually, they get used to it and then in the end, hurts me in the process.

One recent reminder that I shouldn’t always help people in need is the time when my older cousin had a falling out with her live in partner. They have been together for almost 5 years now and it was only a couple of months ago did she find out that he was cheating on her for one of her friends who lived nearby. At first they were only rumors until she did her own investigating and found out the truth. Seeing them exiting from a nearby motel while acting like lovers confirmed the rumors. She immediately left him that instant. Although she was only able to take a few things with her, she vowed to come back for the rest of her things. Her partner who suddenly felt regret for what he had done to her wanted to have her back but she wasn’t budging. After a couple of nights of moving from one friend to another, she contacted me. She said she needed a place to stay because of what had happened. I invited her to my home that day and for letting her stay in my home for free, she said she was willing to help with some chores. I let her but didn’t really rely on her too much. All I ever offered was rehabilitation for her to think things through. I actually wanted her to stop seeing him and just move on. She was a single mother after all. I advised her that it would be best if she just focused on her daughter for now and get a job. She agreed to it and I thought that she has changed. Unfortunately, it was all a lie.

After spending Christmas with me and my husband, she went to our other relatives’ home in order to spend the New Year there. Her daughter was with her the whole time and I was glad that they could finally spend some quality time together. Little did I know that in the end, she spent the New Year not only with her daughter but with her live in partner as well. After that the rest was history which infuriated me. Sure, it wasn’t my life to live, true but after everything that he did to her, she should have learned her lesson. Repeatedly lying to her and lying about sleeping with another woman is just not cool. I know about giving second chances but she confessed to me that this has happened before. What makes her so sure that it won’t happen again? All I could do was shake my head in frustration. I wanted to strangle her for being so stupid. I guess I can now confirm that even the sharpest minds can become dull all because of love. She might not have been the sharpest tool in the shed but come on, this is just common sense. Anyway, she left some of her things in my home during her stay and because I didn’t want to see her at that time, I made up excuses and reasons as to why I couldn’t be home to actually assist her in collecting her things. I simply left her belongings to my neighbor who lived next to my apartment and knows her so that when she arrives, she will be able to get it. I was home the entire time but I just didn’t want to see her. My neighbor told me that she arrived with her partner to help her collect her things. I didn’t want to see them both because I felt used and was infuriated by it. Last thing I heard is that she was planning to get married to the said guy and she even asked me what the requirements were to get married but I simply dismissed the message and ignored her.

If there is one thing I learned from that experience, it is the fact that even the kindest people experience abuse. I was merely trying to help her life get better but I guess she didn’t want it to get better. She said she needed my help but I guess she didn’t. All she needed was someone to use while she didn’t have someone to take her in. I was the idiot who took pity on her and took her in without reservations and judgment. I should have known better. I guess this is one reason why I am not as good as I used to be.

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Posted on April 27th, 2015 by kittypaws


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