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Self Worth

The first time I joined a pageantry (I was selected by my boss department) I almost swoon, It’s my first job, new environment and as I have said before I have a very low self confidence. So I asked my superiors and it went like this. “Why did you choose me? I’m not pretty or tall, there are others that are capable than me as a representative of our department. But my superior told me, “I saw something in you and of course your pretty, you just got to believe in yourself”. Because of those words of encouragement I accepted the offer (they were my bosses after all) but still at the back of my head there still a lingering doubt. A week before the event many people noticed that I was too shy and sensitive. And I want to shout at them “I told you so! I’m not fit for this”. I was so negative and I had a hard time hearing those criticisms.
But to my surprise even though I walk head down and much less of a self worth with the other experienced competitors that I will face, my team still cheered for me and helped me learn something about this search. So in my part I still tried to do it, “go with the flow” is what I did. But I noticed that almost everyone that I know in the office are giving me advise and actions on how to win it, everyone is excited and pretty sure that I will win (even though I have a competition of a beauty queen and a model at a certain mall). So what the heck since everybody believed that I would win I decided to stop trying and did my best to step up and be confident for once, what funny is I started believing that with that kind of support I will win. So I did whatever I need to do, I practiced a lot, reviewed possible answers to the questions, take in the advised that I had with the people that had help me through the way… and at the day of the competition I had the confidence to face the audience, heads up and with a smile, I am worthy after all that there are people who truly cares. I did not get any special awards but, yes, I won.

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Posted on November 19th, 2013 by bonita


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