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Don’t hide the truth-it hurts others

It seems like all life lessons that you learn, someone or lots of people have told you about it before. Or inherently, you know it’s wrong. Take lying for an example. You know you shouldn’t lie. Everyone tells you not to lie. Your parents, when you are very young, tell you not to lie. Have you ever lied? Of course you have. Everyone, at some point in their life, has lied. It is not good. Lies hurt. They don’t just hurt the person you are lying to; lies tend to make the liar guilty, and guilt eats away at their soul. That’s no way to live. In my sophomore year of college I liked a guy in one of my classes. We would flirt back and forth, and sometimes study together, but neither one of us actually asked the other out on a date. At the same time, I was also working as a bartender at a local bar. The other bartender at the bar, Mike, had a crush on me. He was a little older than me, so I didn’t really start any of the flirting, but he was also so nice to me. He would bring me a shaved ice before my shift, because he knew I liked them. And he would always help me clean up after closing, even though I was the only one scheduled for the closing shift. We started to become really good friends, but we never went out on a date-I know now it was because he was scared I would say no and then things would be awkward between us. Classes were getting ready to end, and finally that cute guy in class asked me out on a date. We went out and had a blast. I had to work after the date so he dropped me at my job. Well, Mike saw him drop me off and didn’t really say much the rest of the shift. At the end of his shift, he was starting to pack up and I kind of joked with him about the first time he didn’t offer to help me clean. He very bluntly asked me if that guy that dropped me off was my boyfriend. I told him that we had just been on a date and that was it. I didn’t tell him that I had been crushing on the guy for a long time. I’m not sure why, I guess I kind of liked Mike too and didn’t want to ruin anything between us. Well, feelings definitely started to develop with the guy from class and we started going out all time. I never told Mike, but I think he sensed something was different. Mike finally asked me out on a date towards the end of the summer, and I didn’t want to hurt his feelings so I said yes. The date was very awkward, because I felt guilty and Mike could sense the guilt. I finally told him at the end of the night that I was seeing someone. He told me he had thought so. I could tell he was hurt. In the fall I got an internship, so I quit working at the bar and didn’t really hear much from Mike. I still feel somewhat bad about that summer. If I would have been upfront with Mike to begin with, he wouldn’t have crushed on me all summer, I wouldn’t have hurt his feelings, and I could possibly still have a good friend. The moral of the story is-of course lies are bad, but hiding the truth isn’t much different. Just be honest.

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Posted on January 13th, 2014 by grujack

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